March 13, 2019
Courtesy of Elise Morgan
Moving your parents into an assisted living home is almost never going to be an easy process, and although there are many benefits to the transition, it’s inevitable that some aspects of the change will in one way or another upset them. Oftentimes, when being moved into a senior living home, parents may feel abandoned and believe that they are losing part of their identity.
Instead of having your parents feel as though they are ending the life they have always known, ensure them that they are moving into a new chapter of their lives and make the transition as smooth as possible with the following tips.
- Encourage Your Parents to Participate in Community Activities
Make the transition smooth and mitigate second-guesses from your parents by introducing them to the community and encourage them to participate in the home’s activities. This should be done both before the big move and after – helping your parents make friends and get to know their way around the community.
Assisted living communities have plenty of activities for your parents to participate in, and while not all may appeal to them, some may really grab your loved ones’ attention. When residents feel as if they have a place among the community, it is bound to help their outlook on the transition and even has the possibility of making the move a little bit easier.
- Make it Feel Like Home
This is where they will be living from now on, so make it feel like home. Not all assisted living homes have the idea of coziness in mind when designing the rooms, so be sure to bring over any items that can help with this. Some starter ideas to vamp up their new room for comfort is to sprinkle in family pictures and to add color to the walls with new paint or to the floor with a lovely rug. To maximize their bedroom for ultimate comfort, consider bringing in their old bed that they trust, or a new one that they will love instead of the typical assisted living mattress that is not typically designed for comfort. When you prioritize their home living space, your parents will start to recognize this as their new home in no time.
- Show Your Parents That They Did Not Lose Their Independence
It’s hard to not feel protective over your parents as they switch to a new home, but don’t feel that you need to be with them at all times during the move. In fact, this can actually hurt their progress, as excessive ‘handholding’ could inhibit your parent from successfully adjusting to their new home. Let your parents feel as if they still have control over their own life, and let them choose their own schedule, their own friends, and other decisions that are most important to them.
- Prepare Yourself for Bad Days
This transition is usually not going to be a walk in the park, so prepare yourself for your parents not taking to their new home immediately. You may experience some negative comments here and there, but remember that this is an important time in their lives and that this change is only to benefit them – not hurt them. Instead of taking these negative comments or feelings personally, document them and see them as an opportunity for places of improvement to their lifestyle down the road.
Just like any transition, it will take time to integrate your parents into their new home, but stay positive and know that this way they will lead a healthier and safer lifestyle.
- Remember – It Will Get Easier
Even though moving your parents into their assisted living home is difficult right now, know that it will not always be this way. Soon enough, your parents will start to get used to their new lifestyle, and the more that they are involved in the community and activities, the more likely it is that they actually begin to really love it. At the end of the day, remember that you made the right choice for this situation and that you did your best during this difficult time in everyone’s lives.
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February 5, 2019
Courtesy of Lizzie Weakley
Every year marks a fundamental life change for tens of thousands of people in the United States: the transition from work to retirement. Many people look forward to the moment when they can step away from their job, but some also experience strong feelings of uncertainty about their newfound lack of direction. Whether you are about to retire or already have been for years, there are a few simple ways that help you get the most out of the experience.
Try New Things
It’s easy for adults to fall back on the familiar and stick to old habits, especially immediately following retirement. However, forcing yourself to explore new things can open up opportunities and make the golden years a lot more colorful. Taking art lessons, learning to cook new foods, and meeting new people are just a few ways to bring a breath of fresh air into daily life.
Mobile Living and Travel Lifestyle
Mobile and RV lifestyle isn’t a good fit for everyone, but modern vehicles often sport a number of amenities and conveniences that rival any home. Motor and mobile homes can make travel much more affordable and provides greater control over schedule, pacing, and itinerary. Many state and national parks have dedicated space for people using living vehicles, so there are plenty of interesting sites that accommodate this lifestyle.
Consider Moving to a New House
Many people working towards retirement look forward to spending more time with their family members. Checking out homes for sale near close friends and family can create an opportunity to downsize to a more efficient house and cut down on travel time. Other retirees take advantage of their freedom to find a home in an area that has a better climate, more active community, or other desirable features. Moving shouldn’t be a snap decision, but there can be lot of long-term benefits for those willing to consider a big life change.
Stay Active and Involved
Many older adults find themselves lacking stimulation or excitement in their daily life, which can eventually lead to depression or social withdrawal. There are dozens of different ways for retirees to stay active and involved with people in their community. Retirees with specialized skills can also consider getting a part-time job or consulting on as-needed basis to maintain their professional skills.
People have varying opinions and perspectives about the prospect of retirement, ranging from excitement to dread. However, these years can be among the richest and most rewarding of your entire life if you are willing to take a step into the unknown.
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January 16, 2019
December 7, 2018
We’re in the throws of the holiday season, everyone is busy planning for company, shopping, decorating, work obligations, family events, perhaps traveling…and the list goes on.
Sometimes with all that we have brewing during the holidays it’s difficult to make time to give back, but did you know that over 7 million people over the age of 65 fell below the Supplemental Poverty Measure in 2017 and that number is likely to increase this year?
There are plenty of opportunities to give back to seniors in your community during the holidays, here are a few to consider –
Founded in 2014 this New Jersey based non-profit programs’ mission is to provide gifts to as many Seniors living in long-term care facilities as possible. For a annual $50 donation the organization will select a Senior(s) on your behalf and ensure that the individual(s) receive their gifts throughout the year. All gifts will be provided to your Senior in your name by the organization. Gifts include: Holiday Gift, Birthday Gift and 2 other Seasonal Gifts during the year.
If you are in the NY/NJ Tri-State area, you can opt to personally shop and hand deliver your gift as part of their Wish List program.
The poverty rate for Native Americans continues to rise and many need assistance beyond what the reservation’s elder care programs can address. This program, founded in the 1980’s by Linda Myers, focuses on Elders in the remote portions of the Dine’ (Navajo) reservation.
Donors provide $200 annually, covering the cost of a year’s worth of food for an older adult. The program also provides Navajo elders with medicine, clothing, firewood and other essentials. Once you sign on through this Utah-based nonprofit, you’ll receive a photo of the elder you’re paired with, along with his or her contact information, and you’ll be encouraged to stay in touch.
If you are in the Salt Lake City, Utah area, you can volunteer at their warehouse packing food and supplies or with activities such as a Food Run or The Annual Navajo Rug Show & Sale. If you can’t make a donation or attend an event, you are encouraged to share their mission on your social media outlets to help spread the word.
This Home Instead Senior Care program partners with local non-profit and community organizations to identify seniors who might not otherwise receive gifts this holiday season. The company then works with local businesses and retail stores to help facilitate the purchase and distribution of gifts by placing trees and ornaments within their various locations. Each senior’s gift requests are written on a Be a Santa to a Senior bulb.
Since the program’s inception in 2003 over 1.2 million gifts have been delivered to deserving seniors.
The program works like this – Find a participating Be a Santa to a Senior location using the search tool on their website. Remove bulb with senior’s gift request from the tree. Purchase the requested gift(s) listed on the bulb. Place bulb and unwrapped gift(s) in the designated box. Volunteers are also needed to collect, wrap and deliver gifts.
There are many ways to touch a senior’s life not only at this time of year, but year round. If at all possible, take time to make someones life just a little brighter this holiday season. It may just be the best gift you’ve ever given.
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September 28, 2018
By: Darleen Mahoney
You have a lot of stuff that you have collected over the years! You have a lifetime of beautiful memories and well, just stuff! You have artwork that you saved from your children and grandchildren, collectibles when collectibles were a fad, clothes that are out of style, paperwork that is no longer relevant. You may even have furniture and old holiday decorations in the basement or attic that just need to find new homes.
Decluttering your home of all these things as an active Senior is a labor of love for your family. It will also make it much easier for you to sell your home and make your next move.
Leaving the cleaning out and decluttering of your home to your loved ones can be an overwhelming task for them. It is an emotional journey and physical labor of love that adult children and family members endure on their own. They may not know the family history of what is important in your home and can cause family friction. If you declutter your home now, you can share in the memories and find common ground in your cherished family keepsakes.
Whether you hope to live out your days in your current home, retire to a smaller home, retirement community, or the possibility of a continuing care retirement community. The reality is eventually your home will likely need to be sold. Decluttering of the past to move toward the future is a gift that you not only give your loved ones, but yourself.
Studies have shown that clutter causes anxiety, depression, stress, and general feeling of being overwhelmed. Cleaning and decluttering can be a stress-reliever.
There are also tax benefits to decluttering. If you donate your unwanted items to a charitable organization, you may be eligible for a tax write-off. You can also get very creative in donating or re-selling vintage items to re-sell shops or donating to schools looking for theatre production costumes.
Does all of this sound daunting? It doesn’t have to be! Get organized and make a plan!
- Set aside a weekend or specific timeframe
- Make sure you have supplies: garbage bags, boxes, cleaning products
- Start with one room, then have a plan to go room by room
- Go through everything in that room: Label: Keep, Donate, Trash
- Old Documents, you may want to shred
- Ask your family members to join you
- Keep what is important- not to suggest you throw out priceless mementos, most people find out they do not miss “things” that they get rid of after a clean out. Items that do not serve a purpose or cannot be shared with other family members should find new homes.
While the process of decluttering is giving away, throwing away, and passing along to your loved ones is a process that has an element of an emotional journey with things that tie you of your past. Your memories and family legacies are your true history.
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May 31, 2018
By: Darleen Mahoney
As the rate of Alzheimer’s Disease increases and we seem to be on the brink of a cure or treatment. It still seems all too futuristic to those in the here and now fighting for loved ones with the disease.
As the idea that there may be a cure around the corner lingers, the disease is still growing in numbers and being aware of the signs at home in order to get treatment as early detection are keys to potentially living more independently longer, subsiding the symptoms.
Alzheimer’s is a brain disease that causes the slow decline of memory, thinking and reasoning skills. Let’s review basic warning signs. These signs may be experienced differently by each person to varying degrees.
- Memory loss – One might forget recent information like dates or events. Asking the same questions over and over. Using things like post it notes, reminder notes, electronic devices, or even family to remember things they used to remember on their own.
- Problem Solving – One might have problems developing and following a plan or working with numbers. They may start forgetting to pay monthly bills, work electronics like phones, stoves, and remotes, etc. that were everyday routine devices.
- Losing Track of Times and Dates – One might start losing track of dates and time. They may start forgetting how they got somewhere or even where they are.
- Visual Changes – Some Alzheimer’s patients have experiences changes in vision with judging distance, color, and depth perception. These are problematic to those who may still be driving.
- Problems with Speech – One might have trouble following or joining a conversation, they may stop in the middle of a conversation or have no idea how to continue, repeating themselves. They struggle with their words and sometimes are unable to find the right words, calling things by the wrong names at times.
- Misplacing Things – One might start putting things in odd places, losing things, and unable to recall steps to find them. Some may accuse others of stealing those things. This may start occurring more frequently as they may appear to be paranoid.
- Poor Judgment – One may start having poor decision-making and changes in their judgment. They may not be able to deal with money, giving large amounts away or handling it improperly. This makes them more vulnerable to people who may want to take advantage. They may start bathing less and not taking care of their hygiene.
- Withdraws from Family, Social, and Work – One might begin removing themselves from their social activities, hobbies, projects, and even their own family. They start avoiding these situations because of the changes that they are experiencing.
- Mood Changes – The mood and the personality of someone with Alzheimer’s changes as they become confused and become experiencing depression, fear, and anxiety in their daily lives. They are no longer able to find a “comfort zone”.
Clearly, many of these signs can be normal in aging adults. Recognizing multiple and ongoing signs in someone you love should not be ignored, schedule a doctor’s appointment.
There is treatment available with early detection, relief of the symptoms and will help them maintain a level of independence longer.
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May 24, 2018
By: Darleen Mahoney
The decision has been made to keep your aging parent at home a little while longer or they are living with you, but you cannot be there 24/7 and need to take a few safety precautions when you cannot be there.
As 1 in 4 adults over the age of 65 takes a fall, safety is important. This is typically the primary safety concern along with each senior having their own individual health and mental concerns.
Having a plan and exploring what options fit your family, your senior, and the home is always a great start.
If getting a full evaluation of the homes safety is a goal, you may want to contact a certified aging-in-place specialist, occupational or physical therapist, or a geriatric care manager. They will be able to make safety recommendations.
A few quick and easy solutions:
- Raised Toilet Seat
- Shower Chair
- Textured no-slip strips in the bathtub and shower
- Stair climber
- Waterproof seat in the shower
- Controls and switches near bed and/or wheelchair
- Remove throw rugs
- Add monitors and alarms to the home
- Remove locks from doors inside the home
- Change doors to the outside of the home to levers
- Hallway and stairway lighting is efficient
- Adjust thermostat on hot water heater to avoid water getting too hot
Another option in the form of preventative safety when your aging parent or senior is unable to be alone or alone for long periods of time, consider a home healthcare service. They can provide a range of services including: transportation, cooking, light housekeeping, dispensing medication, and other services. Home Healthcare services vary on their offerings, visit www.SeniorLivingGuide.com‘s Home Health tab in your area to find out what specific services that fit your family’s needs.
You have followed all these steps to be proactive with safety, but accidents and emergencies still can happen. What then?
Remember the commercial with the catchphrase, “I’ve fallen, and I can’t get up!”? Since this commercial became a pop-culture phenomenon in its 80’s debut, personal response and medical monitoring devices have been the answer to in-home senior safety and security especially as technology has progressed over the years.
Medical Alarm Monitoring such as, Bay Alarm Medical, may be a turn key and inexpensive solution providing you peace of mind. If your senior has an accident, gets frightened, or has a need for any type of medical attention, a touch of a button alerts the company, authorities, and specific contacts easily.
Whatever your home situation is with your aging parent; keeping safety and security top of mind is key. There are many solutions to consider, but there is a magnitude of resources available both online and offline. Make sure that you do your research and utilize what is available.
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May 16, 2018
Courtesy of Janet Campbell
It’s never too late to become financially literate. Statistics show that 65 percent of Americans do not have a budget, which suggests that many enter their elderly years uninformed about personal finances. Taking good care of your finances at this stage of your life is essential – your financial stability, health and personal happiness are at stake, so consider carefully these tips that financial advisors consider crucial for older adults.
Set a budget
Establishing a budget helps you keep track of where your money is going and makes it considerably easier to plan for the future. Most advisors contend that setting up and sticking to a budget is the most important building block in maintaining one’s financial health. It’s especially important for seniors because it ensures that you’ll have enough money to pay for the things you need and want. If you’ve never lived according to a formal budget, once you’ve got it down and incorporated it into your routine you can predetermine what months you’re likely to be tight on money and when you’ll be in the black. A budget helps you plan for unexpected expenses, those times when life bites you and forces you to dig deep into your funds.
Sidestep the scams
Beware of fast-talking salespeople and telemarketers looking to take advantage of confused and vulnerable elderly people. They’re usually the first ones to be targeted, so watch out for “deals” that involve a lot of complex detail, evasive answers or an unwillingness to answer questions, a lack of documentation (i.e. no paper trail), and pressure to sign a contract right away. This is always a red flag, no matter who’s involved or what stage of life they’re in.
Be skeptical about investments
If you retired with investments, they can give you a real advantage in your senior years but it’s dangerous to rely on them too heavily. A budget can help you forecast but it can’t help you where the market’s concerned. An over-reliance on the returns it can bring is a dangerous way to approach your finances, especially if you’re working with limited funds to begin with. Unscrupulous salespeople are especially dangerous when it comes to stock market investing, which can be arcane and intimidating to someone with limited experience. A good rule of thumb is, if it sounds too good to be true, it probably is. Remember, savings, a good budget and careful money management are the building blocks of a solid financial foundation.
Many people nearing or having reached retirement age tend to see Social Security as a nest egg or financial magic bullet. Yes, you can begin drawing on your social security benefits beginning at age 62, but it can be well worth your while to wait a bit. Nevertheless, it’s estimated that 75 percent of Americans start going through their benefits early, which means they’re not maximizing what they could be getting from Social Security. Timing is a big part of doing Social Security right. Put simply, the longer you wait to draw Social Security, the more you’ll get each month. Taking Social Security before official retirement age (between 66 and 67) results in an unnecessary reduction of your benefits, whereas your benefit increases as much as 8 percent a year if you wait until you reach 70.
Follow the basics
The old rule that says you should have three months of expenses ready to go still stands once you reach old age. If you’ve ignored that rule during your working lifetime, make a good stab at it. Set aside what you can in case the unexpected happens when you’re at your most vulnerable. Some people age 65 or older are able to sell their life insurance policy, which may be an option to consider if you can’t afford the premiums or don’t need one anymore. Just be sure to do your research first so you understand the ins and outs of the process.
Keep following the same good financial advice you’ve gotten throughout your life once you reach retirement age. Budget, save, and stay away from “can’t miss” investment offers. Much of what’s served you well all those years won’t go wrong once you hit 67.
Courtesy of Pixabay.com.
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May 4, 2018
By: Darleen Mahoney
Do you remember the days with the house and the yard and the upkeep? There are days that it seems like yesterday and it was very rewarding, but it was also a lot of work and commitment! You spent your Saturday’s mowing the yard, edging, weed eating, and tending to the garden. You may have really loved the garden most, but all of the work had to be done.
Now you are retired! It’s time to do more of what you enjoy! You’ve moved into a smaller space to fit your retirement lifestyle; to give you more time to yourself, to play golf, to travel, to spend more time with your family, and less time on home maintenance. What you miss the most is the relaxation and satisfaction that you received from gardening. Don’t despair, there are a lot of options for gardening in a small space. Spring is here! Spend some time outdoors tending to a garden and be able to enjoy it!
Here are some fun ideas on how to plant a garden in a small space:
- A Container garden – Containers of different sizes and shapes, including galvanized tubs, in a small outdoor space with various flowers and even vegetables and herbs can create a tranquil setting for anyone to entertain, relax, and enjoy a good book.
- Vertical Planters – Maximize your space by planting vertically! Visit your local nursery or hardware store. Tip: repurposed shutters can be used as a vertical planter.
- Hanging planters – If you have the ability to hang your plants from the ceiling or a wall post, they can be a fun asset as you can also include plants and flowers that will trail down adding a different dimension to your patio or small space.
- Ivy fence – Growing ivy on a small fence around an outdoor space can add a lot of depth to your space and easily provide the garden look and feel you might be looking for.
- Herbs – Mixing and matching herbs in small pots and planters is not only eye-catching, but edible!
- Window boxes – If your space is very limited, a window box may be your best option. Succulents do very well in these and are fairly low maintenance with good drainage.
- Birdbath – How great is this idea? Repurpose a birdbath and pack with hardy succulents and pebbles to hold in the moisture.
If you enjoy gardening, downsizing into a senior living or retirement community may not mean that you must give up that part of your life! There are so many options available to consider. The key is appropriate lighting for your plants and soil, the rest you can get very creative with and create a beautiful and functioning gardening.
Another great article on gardening in small spaces:
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April 25, 2018
Older Posts »
By: Darleen Mahoney
Typically, as people age and it becomes increasingly clear that they are unable to care for themselves, their adult children are left to decide on how to care for them and what those next steps look like, especially for those whose parents are living alone.
You may notice that Dad is forgetting where the car keys are or he is misplacing his phone. Maybe he is not as interested in social interaction with family and more resigned to spending time alone. You recognize that these are signs that he should not be living alone. You find yourself saying to your siblings and family members, “What are we going to do about Dad?”. You know that you need to look at the different options available. You may opt to move them in with a capable family member, choose a home care provider, or move him into a senior living community.
To help make these decisions and form a plan that works for everyone, it can be helpful to have a family meeting with your siblings, other relatives, and/or friends. The family meeting should begin by working out any conflicting care option opinions. Ideally, you will be able to compromise and end with a plan. If you do not feel the meeting will be generally agreeable and emotions have the potential to run high, you can involve a social worker, a family counselor, or a mutually agreed upon mediator to help ensure that the meeting is successful.
As these options are weighed, a clear vision of what success looks like is very important. Consider their mental and physical conditions and how they may progress and the kind of care and assistance they will require in the future. Benefiting your parents’ well-being and health, while maintaining a peaceful and balanced family life should be considered the primary objective.
If you choose to move your family member into your home, please be aware that there are some considerations to make before committing to this role, including a large amount of time. You need to take be honest with yourself and your other family members. Make sure you fully understand the commitment and demands of caring for an aging person and ask yourself if you have the ability to take those on. There will be disruption in your life and relationships, frustration, and a large amount of additional stress that you will be adding to your home.
You may want to look into options of in-home providers, they provide a myriad of services that can be very helpful and free up your time while providing different social interaction for your parent. Understanding the pros and cons – such as how comfortable your family member will need to be with their in-home provider – should be considered before relying on them for specific tasks.
Caring for an aging parent and making decisions regarding their on-going care can be overwhelming. Take the time to consider all of your options, use your support system as a resource, and keep your parents’ best interests at heart – you will find a care option that works for everyone.
http://dailycaring.com/7-things-you-must-do-when-hiring-an-in-home-caregiver/ -Tips for Hiring In Home Care Provider
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